When I was 8 years old and mesmerised by the world of cinema,
I sat starry eyed in front of the idiot box, transfixed by Ingrid Bergman's beauty and how Humphrey Bogart lovingly said,
"Here's looking at you kid."
And how Raj Kapoor serenaded Nargis in the pouring rain.
Love, I have been told, was supposed to be the most beautiful feeling in the world
It made the world turn around,
Made Sinatra want to fly to the moon and Whitney want to dance
When I was 13,
With raging hormones and an acne ridden face,
My dad told me,
"Boys only want one thing from you, so stay away."
While my mom told me,
"There is a right time for everything. After you grow up, everyone falls in love, and there is a Mr. Right for everyone. Yours will be tall, dark and handsome, and a Hindu Malayalee with a stable job and a good family."
And there, my Mr. Right had been defined forever.
Then came high school, when girls cried days and nights over boys,
Thinking about that one popular guy on the basketball team who was supposed to be the modern Prince on a horse,
And not having him whisper sweet nothings to you,
Meant that you had to slash your wrists and carve initials on them,
While guys relied on the sole assurance that
'Nice guys finish last.'
I live in an age where one text is all that it takes to break a year long relationship,
And one "Hey lukin hot" comment on a picture is called flirting.
Pickup lines have been far more simplified,
From "Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?"
To a more comprehensive "ASL?" or a more direct "Dick pic" on the modern swayamvar called Tinder.
From love at first sight to lust at first sight,
From couples in arranged marriages finding love to people on love marriages not being able to stand each other,
From platonic love to friends with benefits,
From summer flings to "Till death do us part."
Love, to me, is like the complex quadratic equation I couldn't solve in school,
The Churchgate local I couldn't get into during peak hours,
Like Paulo Coelho's books that I couldn't understand the first time I read them,
Like the Starbucks coffee I can't understand the hype around,
Like the Game of Thrones characters whose names I cannot remember,
And the taste of caviar that I can never truly appreciate.
Love, is like the deepest ocean whose bottom I cannot find,
And the Pandora's box that I do not want to open,
I would rather support Donald Trump than try to understand what love is,
With its labyrinthine ideas and conundrums,
Love is a puzzle I cannot understand,
And yet, you ask me,
"Do you believe in love?"
